espresso derailment

funkshoi:
remember the good ol' times?

husk:
The ties that bind

funkshoi:
All my children.

husk:
Octopussy
OCTOPUSSY

funkshoi:
need to get a job
A JOB!

husk:
the things he does

funkshoi:
for octopussy?
I'd pay $50 for that shit.

husk:
worst espresso ever

funkshoi:
you'd think it can do better
with like...
ya know
8 arms?
but i guess that just makes 4 horrible espresso's

husk:
the wheels of steel

funkshoi:
tell me how you feel
if my espresso isn't bright orange on top, i throw it back at the barista's face
and then kill him

husk:
there's people you like, and then there's people you still like
I still like Tom Green

funkshoi:
and then eviscerate his body and flay it over pikes in front of the shop

husk:
there's a 'despite' in there somewhere

funkshoi:
can Tom Green make good espresso?

husk:
I don't really give a fuck if it's a .png or a .gif, seriously

funkshoi:
well I do.
doodoo
like, thats a Tom Green joke
Did you hear about Kevin Costner?

husk:
I saw your Waterworld rant
He still owes us for Postman

funkshoi:
I'll believe it.
He's not getting off the hook that easily.
Can Costner make good espresso?
He should spend some of that invention money to invent a foolproof espresso machine that any idiot can use. Hell, they should be able to make espresso in space.

husk:
Damn it Allen

MONDIAL / SODA TAX / CORN OF HORNS

husk:
i turned 30 this year
so I'm really wise now

rada:
i know
you made it

husk:
by age default
yes i made it
knowledge is fancy

rada:
you're at the plateau, where you can decide to jump off, to your ultimate demise, or, you can stay and be king of that prominence

husk:
bitch, I'm on a train called SURVIVAL EXPRESS
ain't king of shit

rada:
you mastering the theory of evolution

husk:
ain't mastering shit either

rada:
we don't even teach that shit here

husk:
Jesus Christ coloring books freak me out
I would always color THE LORD's eyes dark blue
homeboy's dead, y'know?
and i'd add blood on his hands all the time

rada:
word
1 <3

husk:
like the dude was constantly bleeding
Jesus is eating a burger
with napkins taped to his hands
'cuz he b bleeding
"Want some fries with that, Jesus?"
HELLLZ NO
Jesus self-lolz at "hellz"

rada:
that's my Jesus is you homeboy

husk:
at frat parties, people would always steal his crown of thorns
yo lemme wear dat
aw shiit s'full of blood

rada:
corn of horns

husk:
that old man in the cave at the end of Indiana Jones 3, guarding the Cup of Christ
he's been there a long time man

rada:
he been granted immortality, to live in a remote cave
sounds like a bitchin good time

husk:
yeah but, doesn't it suck?
couldn't you have given me immortality when I was, I dunno, 26 ?
why do I have to be forever old?

rada:
because the fineprint says so

husk:
screw that
I'd rather die than eternally complain about my hip
"Drink Coke, punch a deer"

rada:
geriatrics like to make live a huge pile of steaming suck

PREACHER SPOILER

husk: you never finished Preacher?
troll: i can only read books with pictures
troll: no, i dont think so. or maybe i did
husk: Jesse dies
troll: ok, well, i didnt.

PROOF THAT THERE IS NO GOD / GROWING PAINS, SEASON 2

joebloggz: i just think its funny when people are like
joebloggz: dont be like the son of god. be the son of god
husk: i hate the idea that a God would have a son
husk: it makes God so normal
husk: so i fucked this chick
husk: with my God Cock
husk: and bitch is preggers
husk: we about to have us a fuckin' messiah
husk: shit
joebloggz: well its funny
joebloggz: if you read into the bible
joebloggz: it doesnt sound like he has a son
joebloggz: it sounds like its his human repersentation
joebloggz: of himself
joebloggz: and the holy spirit is an act of himself too
joebloggz: so its like kinda strange
joebloggz: that always confused me
joebloggz: i always read into it like
joebloggz: man
joebloggz: God thinks were dumb
joebloggz: and has to put this shit all simple to us
joebloggz: cause were not god
joebloggz: and we still dont get it
joebloggz: lol
joebloggz: @ humanity
husk: well it's the Bible, lawls at that for starters
joebloggz: i like the bible simply cause
joebloggz: its the one book ive read
husk: and God HAD to do it with a chick
joebloggz: where you cant read it from cover to cover
joebloggz: thats pretty funny, right?
husk: -- why would God create a "human miracle worker" when he created stuff like, say, THE UNIVERSE
husk: fuck that man, create us a fucking three-headed talking Dinosaur or something
joebloggz: he did
husk: I read comics
joebloggz: he created screech.
joebloggz: look at screech
husk: well that's proof that there is no God
joebloggz: and tell me god doesnt have a sense of humor
joebloggz: oh, its proof that if there is a god
joebloggz: the joke is on us
husk: nah I don't see the light
joebloggz: and its funny
husk: could be
joebloggz: like
husk: but it could've been a Dino-Screech
joebloggz: lol- you made vaginas
joebloggz: but std's too
joebloggz: if there was a dino screech
joebloggz: i wonder if we'd have reality tv
joebloggz: or reality would just be crazy eough to miss tv
husk: you've given me less to ponder
husk: HEY
husk: YOU BLOWIN' ???
husk: -- what?
husk: ON FACEBOOK, U BCAME A "FAN"
husk: < / J esus >

JOHN STAMOS "FULL HOUSE" CROSS PROMO VIDEO

joebloggz:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=T-ru6jGYBdA&feature=fvw
joebloggz: youre welcome
husk: there's no hope humans
joebloggz: i disagree
joebloggz: i see that and think there is hope
joebloggz: at least theyre not buying rims they cant afford
joebloggz: oops
joebloggz: too honest
husk: well, i figured:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=O7FtI3cmZ38
joebloggz: oh yeah
joebloggz: i forgot about this
joebloggz: they showed it on an episode of blossom once
joebloggz: and even as a kid
joebloggz: i remember thinkig
joebloggz: THATS CHEESY CROSS PROMO
husk: that era is fucked up
joebloggz: are they grunge?
joebloggz: lawls
husk: lol yeah i remember thinking that too
joebloggz: i like how hes wearing the same wardrobe from the show in his video
husk: they did the same thing in Full House
joebloggz: he also catches the football like a triple b
husk: he musta had lots of pussy back then though
joebloggz: oh man
joebloggz: can you imagine
joebloggz: he probalby just walked to disney land with screech
joebloggz: and cleaned house

Don't cha

pussycat dolls: Don't cha wish your girlfriend was hot like me
husk: no, and I mean it's terribly presumptuous of you to think that you're hotter than my girlfriend. it makes you less attractive actually...
pussycat dolls: Don't cha wish your girlfriend was a freak like me
husk: again, you have no clue what I'm into -- odds are she's freaky enough for me if she's my girlfriend/lover, you know? and from my experience, you might talk the talk but you probably don't walk the walk, know what I'm saying? girls that look like pornstars don't behave like pornstars...
pussycat dolls: Don't cha, Don't cha
husk: no, really no. and it's "Don't you"...
pussycat dolls: Don't cha wish your girlfriend was raw like me
husk: raw? as in, unkept? you don't shower or something? I'm not big on that, seriously...
pussycat dolls: Don't cha wish your girlfriend was fun like me
husk: I don't consider your attempt to initiate any sort of infidelity fun at all.
pussycat dolls: Don't cha, Don't cha
husk: No, I really don't like sluts. Sorry.

I LIKE TO POINT

husk: on all my pics that night, i kept pointing at things
husk: i like to do that apparently
joebloggz: i like pointing
joebloggz: it's semi-aggressive
joebloggz: like
joebloggz: NO, I DIRECT YOU
joebloggz: YOU LOOK WHERE I POINT. YOU SHOOT WHERE I POINT
husk: i think thats what i get out of it too
husk: at least my eyes are in the same direction
joebloggz: its cool, too cause it s like
joebloggz: it could be anything
joebloggz: but people know you're the one people are paying attention to
joebloggz: "oh, hes pointing. hes the leader."
husk: i like to point
husk: yes
husk: i am the leader
joebloggz: i was walking thru the bar the other night and someone was pointing right at me doing that
joebloggz: then i realized he was giving someone directions
husk: damn, you can't let him out-point you
joebloggz: i didnt, he was ugly.
joebloggz: so i won
joebloggz: if youre gonna point
joebloggz: it helps to wear a nice suit
husk: well yes and no, but its like you said, you just can't be ugly and point
husk: wasted-ugly while pointing is fine
husk: i have several points to make when im drunk, while pointing
joebloggz: i agree

hopefully

troll: hopefully when you die, your stuff will be worth a lot!
husk: I hope so!

WHO WATCHES TH--

rada: A 24-year-old man from Eugene, Oregon recently made the boldest statement a person can make about a movie, during a movie, when he committed suicide during a showing of Watchmen at a Regal Cinemas theater.
husk: wow
husk: was that Alan Moore?

PLANKTON

husk: 'sup?
rada: reading about a scientific FAIL
husk: ... The Bible?
rada: lol
rada: nah....this experiment to pump iron into a part of the ocean to sequester carbon
rada: iron would attract phytoplankton, which would built tiny shells and take up CO2 in the ocean
rada: then die, sink to the bottom....
rada: a little less CO2 in the oceans
rada: only problem is, these shrimps ate all the plankton
husk: so, still single?
husk: that's why.

joebloggs: heres the reality show i want
joebloggs: katrina 2: uncensored
joebloggs: lets break a levee
joebloggs: and film
husk: ohh
husk: would it have a stadium scene?
joebloggs: no
joebloggs: too easy
joebloggs: maybe in the credits

LiAlSi2O6: There's a voice that keeps on calling me. 

(Co₃(AsO₄)₂·8H₂O): Ir efe zaoob?

LiAlSi2O6: Every stop I make, I make a new friend. 

(Co₃(AsO₄)₂·8H₂O): Ahfu udye, zad. Inwy jisy mvvijxe dtwrxtpm vstiz kfqzimw.

LiAlSi2O6: Maybe tomorrow, I'll want to settle down, Until tomorrow, I'll just keep moving on.

(Co₃(AsO₄)₂·8H₂O): Be amazed at shimmering flooring?

LiAlSi2O6: No thats silly. it is not even interesting how is anybody supposed to read that stuff. I was trying to be real and all u do is fuck me. I'll just turn in and forget it and pretent i am better than you think i am. . 

(Co₃(AsO₄)₂·8H₂O): when is a chair not a chair? 

LiAlSi2O6: right... typing words. 

MER-EH-CUH

when brown can stick around, when yellow will be mellow, when red men can get ahead man.

Husk:
a poet after obama??
though act to follow
Joe Bloggz:
that poem SUCKED
Husk:
i think that poem gave me my first period
Joe Bloggz:
that poem was so irrelevant
Husk:
know what would've been better?
way better?
Joe Bloggz:
a trailer for iron man 2
Husk:
LOL
that too
Joe Bloggz:
america.
Husk:
damn that would,ve been awesome

DJ STRIPPER

troll: you remember when i had my appartment in ****, at one point I had these strippers living at my place?
husk: ... no?
troll: anyways, yeah, i had strippers living with me for a couple months
husk: lol go on

WEEE-OHH

kevlar: it's the police
kevlar: every little thing she does is magic
kevlar: those are actually in the lyrics
husk: you're full of shit

YOUTUBE FIGHTS

jk: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FJ3oHpup-pk
husk: i retaliate:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AsEYqFQZoQA
jk: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BuVctTeQ7xg
husk: you win

VOTE, EH?

*****: who did ya vote for
husk: Bloc
*****: reform???
husk: no, le Bloc Québecois
*****: wow way to waste a vote...
husk: why's that?
*****: any other vote outside of Dems and the GOP is a wasted one
husk: ok, but I live in Canada
*****: whats wrong with obama??
husk: he seems ok
*****: ?? why didnt you vote for HIM then
husk: I live in Canada

DOES YOUR PAIN HURT

troll: beach whores
husk: that doesn't sound too bad actually
troll: they have sand in their vaginas
husk: does their pain hurt?
troll: no. they love it
husk: then all is well
husk: forever

husk: does your pain hurt?
joe bloggz: no

husk: does your pain hurt?
melons: my hurt hurts

husk: does your pain hurt?
jk: my palin hurts
husk: so obvious
jk: so current
husk: so now
jk: so us
husk: fal;jkfa

Frank Quinto: i have a question for you
Frank Quinto: imperial star destroyer vs. uss enterprise?
Joe Bloggz: hmm
Joe Bloggz: uss enterprise from...the next generation
Frank Quinto: the kirk days
Joe Bloggz: nah fuck that
Joe Bloggz: picard could take on the imperial
Joe Bloggz: but not kirk
Joe Bloggz: imperial star destroyer had mavericks

Joe Bloggz: the real question
Joe Bloggz: who would you rather fuck
Joe Bloggz: palin..or kuccinchs wife
Frank Quinto: threesome?
Joe Bloggz: You're a maverick

MARRIAGE

husk: go and marry sheep if you want
husk: I don't care
joe bloggz: well
joe bloggz: you have to protect innocent animals
joe bloggz: you cant go around making new diseases and raping unwilling animals
husk: wait
husk: there's willing animals?