INTERVIEW WITH RADA

Husk interviews fellow Equivocalists

husk: you available?
rada: sure
rada: 4:20 MAN! i'm tuning out man!
husk: what?
rada: j/k
rada: what's up?
husk: when was the last time you played Lemmings®?
rada: 9 years ago?
rada: wait....no, i've never played lemmings.
husk: is Dr.Phil really concerned with ratings?
rada: he's more concerned with making women cry, so yes, he must be concerned with ratings.
husk: have you ever caught anyone pleasuring themselves?
rada: no person, but i have caught numerous dogs licking themselves.
husk: will there be an end to Holiday/Christmas movies featuring Vince Vaughn?
rada: No. As he gets older, the amount of those movies will increase exponentially until we all shove tootsie rolls into your eyes and ears.
rada: the only candy i could think is was tootsie rolls
husk: LIES ALL LIES
husk: so, Fission track dating?
husk: 'sup with that
rada: it's a way to date shit. you ever date anything that was over 10 million years old?
husk: were you ever under the impression that you broke your penis during intercourse, given that you've had any?
rada: yes, no, i...thing is....
rada: no. i thought i lost my dick inside a vagina once, but i think that just says something about my deep-seeded fear of vagina dentata
husk: why is LOST season 2 superior to every other LOST seasons to date?
rada: i don't watch LOST you depressing fuck
husk: YOU'RE depressed
rada: you've reminded me that i don't have a TV and that I don't even have the will to download TV shows. it's more a breath of fresh air than anything else.
husk: what would be the title of your autumn blockbuster Horror Comedy?
rada: Piranha Punch. It would involve a specific type of piranha that only attacks menstrating females. It's star Rob Schneider as a camp counselor who discovers these fish were brought over from south america by some crazy biologist
husk: plants... how obvious
husk: k we're done
rada: you picked the worst time.....my brain is fried
husk: makes it even better
rada: lol
rada: piranah punch?
rada: god....that's horrible

INTERVIEW WITH JOE BLOGGZ

Husk interviews fellow Equivocalists

husk: were you ever under the impression that you broke your penis during intercourse?
joe bloggz: yes

INTERVIEW WITH TROLL

Husk interviews fellow Equivocalists

husk: ever done a self-punch?
troll: self slap, yes, self punch, yeah, probably, not too hard though
husk: does everyday life make you cringe?
troll: yes, absolutely
husk: your thoughts on Facebook:
troll: ugh
husk: were you ever under the impression that you might've broken your penis during intercourse?
troll: no, but ive been under the impression that ive broken a girl's vagina during intercourse
husk: ever caught someone masturbating?
troll: nope, and the funny thing is, its normal to do, but uncool to get caught doing.
husk: what would be the name of your Action Movie?
troll: Resistance is Futile
husk: what would be the name of your summer blockbuster Romantic Comedy?
troll: Gettin' caught (masterbating)
husk: starring SinBad

INTERVIEW WITH JK

Husk interviews fellow Equivocalists

husk: let me know when you have a few minutes to waste
jk: how many minutes?
jk: are we talking 6 or 7... or more like 8 or 9?
husk: I'm about to do another spontaneous Q&A
jk: you planned a spontaneous Q&A?
husk: planning it as I type
jk: so right now you're not planning at all
husk: no
jk: i will allow you three questions. any questions asked following the third, and final, question will cause you great shrinkage
jk: and no cameras, please
husk: is the word "taint" in your everyday vocabulary?
jk: "taint" often comes out of my mouth... but it's orated biweekly as opposed to daily
jk: perineum sounds much nicer. like a yearly flower.
husk: elaborate on the Pax Romana:
jk: could you give it to me in a sentence?
husk: what is the Pax Romana
husk: thoughts on the Pax Romana
husk: Smashing Pumpkins Zeitgeist is an insult to music
jk: oh, i'm sorry, the correct answer was what is the Pax Romano... and that brings jerry back into the lead with $1,100. please pick a category.
husk: see also; Pax Augustea
husk: were you ever under the impression that you might've broken your penis during intercourse?
jk: funny you should ask... in fact, this has happened to me. what concerned me more was that i still wanted to finish...
husk: thanks that is all
jk: but baby, i'm not done
husk: no shrinkage here buddy
jk: so the zeitgeist comment wasn't a question?
husk: zeitgeist is ALWAYS a question
jk: if zeitgeist is questionable, why isn't anyone asking?
husk: the "why" simply boggles the mind
jk: i'm your manic existential pixie dream hunk
husk: it's akin to asking "are we alone in the Universe?" -- too grand an inquiry
jk: like if natalie portman's character from garden state had muscles and a crew cut with tribal tattoos
jk: (the crew cut has tribal tattoos)
jk: the word "we" already implies that we're not alone.
jk: give 'em an inch, ya know?
jk: earth is just a drip of blue paint on a shitty jackson pollock
jk: hello?